grasshopper.

numbers 13:33:: "... and we became like grasshoppers in our own sight, and so we were in their sight."

the Israelites were comparatively grasshoppers [small compared to who they were spying out], but a large - very large - component was missing in their fearful estimation. no matter their size, this was God's promise to them. meaning, it was theirs. it was going to happen. they just needed to do the thing. and that was to go!

yet, i read this, and immediate conviction sets in:: "i'm a grasshopper!" i know and believe in what God has called me to do, but i see what i have to do to get there, and all i can see are giants. being exactly like the Israelites, completely forgetting His promises, i shut down. but then, He so graciously persists and reminds me - "never will I leave you. do not be afraid or tremble at them. I go with you. I will not fail you or forsake you. I go ahead of you. do not fear or be dismayed. be strong and courageous." [deuteronomy 31] so with Him in front of me, i go and begin to do the thing. and He moves...

perhaps, if we would stop whining. stop complaining. stop trying to get ahead of God, but rather, kept our eyes fixed on Him - the author and perfecter of our faith [hebrews 12:2] - not looking to the right or the left [proverbs 4:27], we would be able to courageously move past the "giants" we face in our lives and radically chase after Him.

this season, God is showing me how He calls us to the impossibles in our life. and He's changing me to confidently praise Him in that. because in the impossible in my life, He receives the most glory.

the grasshopper mentality is no more. the God in whom i serve, is beyond mighty - and He goes before me. before us. we follow Him. He empowers us. strengthens us. and makes us bold. so here goes to losing it all, to follow after Him - completely.

i get in my car to go do something beyond me. these are the lyrics to what immediately begins playing on the radio...

Never got anywhere
By running away
Never learned anything
Without anything
without a mistake
Never loved anyone
By playing it safe
It's a long way, but
I'm right here now, so...

Here goes nothing,
Here goes everything
Gotta reach for something
or you'll fall for anything
Take a breath,
Take a step,
What comes next
God only knows
But here goes

I don't wanna turn around
and wonder what happened
Never lost and never found
Are one and the same
I wanna run across the battle lines
And take my chances
Not the long way 'round
When I'm here right now

Here goes nothing,
Here goes everything
Gotta reach for something
or you'll fall for anything
Take a breath,
Take a step,
What comes next
God only knows
But here goes

divine timing.

heaven forbid, forty years pass by and i find myself sitting in the comforts of this life, but with a deep regret and realization of not jumping into a life of God's promises..........